The choices we make

I opened my plan for the week only to realize that it was the plan for the past week. 

I didn’t make a new plan for this week. 

And it’s already Thursday. Somehow. 

My first thought was, “I failed. Again. I keep trying to do everything right, but I never succeed.”

Of course I don’t. I never will.

The thing is, I can’t do everything right. Nobody can. And the sooner I accept that, the sooner I will start not only feeling better, but also actually getting things done.

Because getting frustrated over your own imperfections doesn’t lead you to perfection. It does, however, consume a lot of your time and energy. You know, the time and energy you could’ve spent on being productive.

If you forgot to do something, you have at least two options: 1. Go and do it now. 2. Don’t do it, but instead keep punishing yourself for forgetting about it. Looks pretty obvious, but the fact is, we tend to choose the second option more often than we think. 

My week wasn’t messed up because I didn’t make a plan. Sure, I might have missed a couple things, because plans really do help to keep track of everything that needs to be done. But I haven’t missed anything vitally important. I still got a lot done. The week isn’t even over yet, so I can still catch up on other things. And I can always write a new plan. 

It’s all about the choices we make. I can choose to see it as a “failure”, or I can say “Oops, I forgot to do it. Oh well, so what. Next time I’ll try to do better.” 

Imagine if we could make those choices in our interactions with other people. 

Your boss can remember that you are a valuable employee and treat you with respect and gratitude. Or he can choose to be a rude jerk, because he had a fight with his wife earlier and he’s in a bad mood. His choice. 

Your partner can focus on the love between you and all the good moments in your relationship, or hold a grudge because of something you said or did. Again, not your choice.

You smile at the lady behind the counter in a shop, wishing her a good day. How she responds to you is her choice. 

Wouldn’t it be great if you could make choices for all those people? If you could choose for them to treat you the way you want? The way you deserve? 

It would be pretty cool, I agree. But we know it’s impossible. (Which makes perfect sense, because, you know, free will and all that…)

However, it is very much possible when we deal with ourselves. 

You can choose to treat yourself the way you deserve to be treated. 

You can choose to be kind to yourself. 

You can choose to be supportive of yourself.

You can choose to be proud of your accomplishments.

You can choose to be understanding when you make a mistake. 

You can choose to be patient with yourself.

You can choose to be your own best friend.

Why would you even consider being anything other than that?