As the year comes to an end, many of us find ourselves reflecting on the year’s wins and losses, and making plans for the future.
If we find time for that, of course.
The thing is, though, there’s always time. It’s more about finding the energy and mustering the courage to be honest with yourself.
Of course, you don’t have to. After all, it’s just a date on the calendar, isn’t it? Nothing magically changes overnight. No matter how much we would like it to.
Change takes time and effort. And whether the beginning of a new year is a big thing for you–or you couldn’t care less–it’s still a great time to sit down and reflect.
The end of the year can be quite an overwhelming time. When you’re overwhelmed and stressed, when you have a million things on your mind and your to-do list, it’s easy to end up feeling lost and confused. To miss the important part.
And by the important part I mean looking back and assessing what you have achieved. What this past year has taught you. Have you changed? Have you grown? Have you done anything you should be proud of?
First of all, you’ve made it through this year, with all the challenges and obstacles life keeps throwing at you. It’s already a big win. It’s a massive accomplishment.
But look deeper. Look at the details. Find a few minutes amongst the festive craziness to sit down and think. Pick up your notebook, or open your notes app on the phone. Start writing down the things you have accomplished. All of them, big and small. Don’t rush with the plans and resolutions. They’ll come later. Acknowledging what you want to change in your life is important, but it also means focusing on the things that you lack. That you “failed at” so far–in your own thinking. Start with the things that you have achieved first. You’ll be surprised. We tend to overlook these things. We take them for granted. They always come with a “but”, have you noticed?
“Well, yes, I did publish a book this year, but only one… And I haven’t finished writing my next one.”
“Well, yes, I did make some progress in my career, but I want more. This isn’t enough.”
“Well, yes, I did make some great memories of traveling/spending time with friends and family/reading good books/watching movies/going to concerts, but I wish I had done more. Seen more. Read more. Written more.”
I’m sure you’ll find these thoughts familiar. We always seem to focus on the things we want/need/haven’t accomplished/fear missing out on.
Except it doesn’t help. It’s the least productive thing to do. You can’t go back in time and change things. But you can make a plan for the future. A solid, detailed plan of actions you are willing and ready to take in order to achieve those goals.
But first, you need to acknowledge your wins. Contradictory to my favorite quote, “Don’t look back, this isn’t where you’re heading,” sometimes you need to. Sometimes, you need to look back and assess what you’ve done wrong and what you’ve done right. Doing that will help you with creating your plan for the future.
Look at what you have achieved and learned this year. Give yourself credit. See how much effort you have put in. It’ll show you how capable you are of achieving things when you are truly determined.
At the beginning of the year, I was terrified each time I was invited to do an author interview. I still did. But I never went back to watch them. It bothered me. So I made a decision to step out of my comfort zone. I started a podcast. Then I started a YouTube channel. Later in the year, I had an idea of making a series of videos with daily reminders. Things I myself need to be reminded of, from time to time. I spoke on podcasts. I’ve done several interviews on YouTube.
At some point, I felt deflated and discouraged. After constantly putting in a lot of time, effort, and energy, sometimes I feel like it’s not leading anywhere. I’ll be completely honest–I regularly think of giving up.
And that’s where I’m going wrong.
Whether my words reach thousands of people, or hundreds, or only a handful–they still matter. They can still make a difference. If I can help one person today–in one way or another–it’s already worth it.
And without a shadow of a doubt I know I have grown from this experience. I have overcome my fears. I stepped out of my comfort zone. I still don’t have thousands of subscribers–and I don’t know if I ever will–but I am proud of what I have achieved. I’m proud that I accepted my own challenge. And this is what I decide to take with me into the new year.
I haven’t published several books, learned a new language, or climbed Everest. I haven’t saved the world. But I created several new ones in my stories. I published the last novel in my fantasy trilogy. I wrote several short stories for my upcoming collection. I started writing poems. As of today, I’ve made fifty videos with encouraging daily reminders. I went to another city to see a concert by my favorite band. I listened to music, read amazing books, made new friends on different social media platforms, watched some breathtaking sunsets at the sea, and took thousands of photos and videos. I celebrated my little son’s fourth birthday, and in a few days, I’ll be celebrating my elder son’s eighteenth.
There are so many blessings, wins, achievements, and miracles in my life that I’m feeling overwhelmed when I think about it.
And this is a good way of feeling overwhelmed. It’s the right way.
Please find the time to reflect and count your blessings. Please celebrate yourself, your life, and all your accomplishments this year. And then–if you do decide to make New Year resolutions–you’ll be making them not from the position of lacking something or being unhappy with your life. You’ll be looking at what other incredible things you can do in your amazing–one and only–life.
Take care of yourself. Be kind to yourself. And don’t forget to be proud of yourself.
Author Elena Carter 